Kate Bosworth Needs To Stop Dressing Like Gidget
Gidget was cute and all, but she belongs to a bygone era. An era when white-sunglasses were cute because they matched your white go-go boots, when tunics reigned supreme, and Flipper kept Americans glued to their black and white TV sets after suppertime. I appreciate that Kate B. doesn’t dress like Britney Spears and all them… but dang!
They’re Just Ordinary Lame Asses
James Blunt and John Legend fancy themselves some hoochies, as is evidenced by these pics. It’d be okay if this was like, R. Kelly and Kid Rock. But it ain’t! These guys are supposed to be sophisticated or something, right? Those record company people are such liars! James really likes this slapper, though — check out that finger lock he’s got on her.
John merely comes off as a male stripper in the beginning stages of his shift. TMZ says John was in Vegas. I have no clue where James Blunt was, nor do I care. Gnarly.
At Least She Matches!
Britney Spears hasn’t dressed this nicely in a good, long while. She was in Miami performing another one of her ‘non’ performances (that to me, just looks like blind, uncoordinated people playing musical chairs and moving their lips in and out of synch with a backing track). This time her track skipped, though. No matter — because people who go to her shows have no interest in real music, anyway.
On her way home, though, she apparently balked at flying on a commmercial jet because the seats weren’t real leather. This coming from the queen of busted weaves! She held up the flight and actually bailed! On the bright side, this could be a sign that she posesses at least some standards.
Finally, People In Cannes Who Should Actually Be There!
Cannes received a much-needed injection of talent when these two arrived. Angie was, of course, here to promote her movie A Mighty Heart, and I guess Brad was there for Ocean’s 13 (which I am not going to see because Ocean’s 12 sucked and kept on sucking). She’s starting to look like Liz Hurley, though, which is kind of weird.
Jessica Simpson Ditched Class
When I say ‘class’ I mean the bun and clean make-up she was sporting in the last picture I posted of her and not actual school (although she probably ditched real-life class as well, because she is not very smart and it shows).She looks like banana pudding.
"CHANEL" Means "Fugly Dresses" in French
Chanel had an elaborate Runway Show in Santa Monica, CA this weekend. They brought the couture to Hollywood, which was kindhearted of them. A whole slew of wealthy, privileged slappers showed up, many of them in some unbearably heinous dresses.
Not all were bad, though. Ali Larter looks pretty good. Lily Allen went, too. I find this a little odd, as she seems a little anti-establishment. Whatever.
Mornin Y’all!
ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- Charles Lindbergh completed the first (solo) non-stop transatlantic flight aboard his plane “The Spirit of St. Louis” [May 20-21, 1927]. Dude flew from New York to Paris! That’s something, isn’t it?
- I posted this busted-ass picture of Gwyneth Paltrow for no reason whatsoever. [May 21, 2007]
You Probably Know This Already. . .
Hilary Duff was “gifted” with this bag at some Hollywood shindig the other day. Five-Finger Discount is right! When people steal from your neighborhood GAP or Grocery Store they mark up the prices and the honest consumer has to suffer. That’s what this is! So if you see this bag in the store and are suprised that it costs $5 Million dollars — don’t be! You are paying for Hilary Duff’s ‘”free” swag!
Keira Knightley Needs To Shut Her Gob!
There’s nothing wrong with Keira Knightley, yet she is rumbling on at the mouth again about her lack of bodymeat. Last we heard, she was going on and on about how Beth Ditto was the hottest thing since sliced bread. For some reason, I don’t think Beth Ditto found this complimentary, either.
This time she’s casting a whole load of unneccessary attention on Monica Bellucci. Keira says that she “would love to have tits,” and that she “would love to have Monica Bellucci’s figure.”
Why the hell do I need to know this? So here’s a picure of Monica Belluci. I also included a pic of Keira’s boyfriend, Ruper Friend, because she’s probably going to say she wishes that she had his lovely little figure, too.
More Paris Hilton News !
There is a troubling rumor flowing through the gossip mill that this THING will make millions in jail by keeping a journal of her memoirs. A source told The SUN UK that:
There will be details of clashes with prisoners and disgusting meals. . . She thinks this will show she is paying her debt to society.
First off, her so-called “debt to society” won’t properly be paid unless she is crucified on Roberston Boulevard or something. Second, I doubt sincerely that she even possesses the ability to put “pen to paper,” so I’m pretty sure this little memoir will never come into fruition. Why can’t she just go to jail on June 5 and shut the hell up about it?
The Pirate’s Of The Caribbean Premiere Was Lame!
So the Pirate’s of The Caribbean Movie premiere happened last week and from the looks of these pics, it was the place to be! [snicker] Johnny Depp showed up looking like Johnny Depp usually looks when he humbles himself by stepping foot in The United States, and Orlando Bloom looked like a freshly scrubbed student at Brigham Young University. By the way, he seriously needs to grow his hair out because the long tendrils sort of balanced out his size-zero figure (I’m positive that Kate Bosworth was just starving herself to fit into his jeans).Curiously, the cast of Dancing With The Porn Stars showed up. Why? Oh yeah, Terry Hatcher was also there with her daughter, Emerson. It’s creepy that I even know her daughter’s name!
leave a comment