The Stache is growing on me

Will the paps lay off my man?  Here’s some pics of WhOrly rushing to my apartment.  We have a dinner date.  We’re eating bangers and mash, bitches!  Ha Ha.  I said that he went for a ride in the fugmobile a few weeks ago — but I take that back!   Orly will never be FUG.  He just happens to look like an extra from Howard’s End, but I can deal with that.

P.S.  If my posts are becoming increasingly delusional as of late, chalk it up to fistfuls of Tylenol. 

You’re not Brigitte Bardot, you silly H*

Did you read the quote on this page?  Hmm.  Dumb hos have been saying this for 200 years!   I can’t stand Hewlitt Packard!  Someone enlist her ass fast.  Anyone who talks about not being able to drink but being able to kill needs to be signed up  just for being annoying.  By the way – beer kills too, beyotch!

P.S.  The size of your head rivals Sienners Miller’s.

L.A. StInk

She looks like a walking, talking garbage can!  By the way, I haven’t seen L.A. Ink, yet.  I just know the slag from Miami Ink.  Is it good?   Anybody watch?  My sissies have a crush on Chris Garver — that is the only reason I know anything about any of this shit.

Fug Slag Alert!

At first, I thought this was another pic of Sienners and I almost threw up, but then I realized it was Avril, and then I did throw up.  Just kidding.   She’s trying to look nice!  That’s so gross.

True love conquers all

Just in case you’re in the mood for another dumb ass story, I’m blessing you with two of them.  Okay, that made like no sense!  Sorry.  Anyway, Kate Moss took her daughter and some of her little friends to the circus and couldn’t afford to buy them all some cheap ass sunglasses.  

I’m pretty sure they only took cash and she didn’t have any cash and that’s it, but they’re making a big deal out of this like she’s on the dole or something.   Bitch just bought a Rolls Royce!

The second story involves her needle and bone reunion with Pete Doherty that involved shacking up in a hotel when she returned from her retreat in Spain.  Says a source:   “Kate has been like a moth to the flame.  When she got back to Britain, they met up at the hotel. He cried and she cried.  She said she had been avoiding him because she had promised everyone from her managers to her mother that she would.  She told him, ‘It’s not me.  It’s just what they all made me do’.”

Yeah, we know, Katers!  

Sorcery  { Too poor for sunglasses }

Sorcery   { Reunited Crackheads }

On This Day in History: August 24, 2007

A.D. 79 – Mount Vesuvius blows the fuck up!  The cities of Pompeii, Herculaneum, and Stabiae are buried in volcanic ash.  Click the continue reading tab for more Pompeii!

410 – The Visigoths under Alaric begin to pillage Rome for three days.

1349 – Six thousand Jews are killed in Mainz after being blamed for the bubonic plague.

1391 – Jews massacred in Palma de Mallorca.

1572 – Saint Bartholomew’s Day Massacre: On the orders of king Charles IX of France, a massacre of Huguenots (French Protestants) begins.

1831 – Charles Darwin is asked to travel on HMS Beagle.

1858 – In Richmond, Virginia, 90 blacks are arrested for learning.

More Pompeii!

For Daners.

Hi Daners.    Sorry about your technical issues.   Sorry you have to work tonight.   Sorry you and yo’ Kiefs are not intermingled right nows.

Anners & Janers

Sienners wants to make baby

I almost feel bad for posting this pic of Sienners.  She looks clammy and gross, but whatevs, it’s in the public domain, so Ha Ha Bloody Ha.  Anyways, Sienners wants to start a family soon because ”she’s convinced she was destined to be a mother and not an actress. “  Yeah,  she’s prob right about that because the slag CAN’T ACT. 

Says Sienners:  “I know I want that because I have way too much love to give.  If I have a child, it can all go there.  I was never desperate to be famous.” 

So go have a bloody kid and get the hell out of our faces!   And take Keira Knightley’s manic depressive arse with you.   Oh I kid.   We love Sienners and Keirers both and I’m not kidding.      

Sorcery

In the bedroom(s)

Some new dirt is blowing around that Tom Cruise and his neophyte wife, Kate Holmes,  have their own bedrooms.   They scares me.   Legend has it that this is all due to his snoring.  Ha!  Legend also has it that Kate’s room is decorated to the rafters with stuffed animals.  They scares me! 

Of course some hobag source had to add this little tidbit:   ”Of course they spend time together alone at night like most married couples; after all, they conceived Suri!” They scares me!

Liars liars pants on fires.  Kate was abducted one night and them bastard aliens impregnated her.  I saw it on the Sci Fi Network!

Sorcery