Ah, now that’s a cute outfit, Banksy

A while ago, my boyfriend (Paul Banks) showed up at The Late Show with David Letterman wearing this gorgeous outfit.  Don’t hate, he’s great.   Here are some more comments from the Banksaholics.  Again, don’t hate!   

this is one of points i would like to understand.
i don´t know why he insists to put his hair in front of his face, wearing dark glasses and use caps which cover his hair and head…

Why????
maybe Banks has ..hum..a little problem with his appearence!!???
do exist articles explainning or did he declare it?

misteries……

I don’t know…I don’t think it’s a problem of self-confidence (he’s looking pretty much handsome lately…)
maybe it’s quite the contrary: he’s probably trying to avoid the “oh my god, you are Paul Banks!!” screaming fans on his way…

I can tell his self-esteem has increased…he isn’t afraid to show his nipples!!

THIS…is a holy outfit. It is godly. It is epic. It is mindblowing. It is couture.

It is thy,
“BANKSY’S WHITE OUTFIT”.

BEHOLD!!!

Slag on Vacation

Kate Moss is in St. Tropez.   Again.   She’s on a vacation from her LIFE or something.  Okay, I’m off to bed.  I just thought it’d be cool to have a picture of a living dinoswhore enjoying the beach in case you are at work and need some stimulation.

* I heard that Kanye West didn’t win any VMA’s last night.  Is that true?  If so, I bet his pillow is drenched with  his salty little tears right about now.   He’s real  weird like that. 

My Sweetheart, The Drunk

Do any of you listen to Jeff Buckley?  If so, then you understand this post title.   For the rest of yous — you  all need to start listening to better music!   Oh just kidding.   Anyway, my boyfriend got drunk off his tiny arse at the GQ Man of The Year Awards.  What a dumb wanker.   Some snitch said that he “lost the plot and was slurring and falling around all over the place.”  Yeah, cuz he weighs as much as a house cat!  I’m sure all it took was one glass of bubbly to push him over the edge.

It was even reported that he ditched his date (me) and went on a ”bizarre womanising [sic] spree.”   Here are some samples I filched straight from the source:   He told artist Tracy Yemin:  “I really respect you Trace, I hope we can be friends for ever,”  and then proceeded to wrap his arms round her.  Then he told (H)Elle Macpherson “I just want to rub my face in your bosoms,” and ’lurched’ towards her.   Then he touched some other slag’s ass (but she didn’t mind).   He was just curious cuz he’s never seen or touched one before, though.    

Whorlando is so getting spanked when I get home!  Did he say ‘bosoms’?  That is so cute.

P.S.  I was gonna title this “Drunk and DisWhorderly.”   I think I like that better.

Sorcery

MTV is stank

My brilliant buddy Afro-Jamaicano wrote up a beautiful little post on this slag fest.   So I’m not even gonna bother.  Click HERE  for a recap of the womenfolk and HERE for a recap of the menfolk or I’ll punch you in the thorax.   Hee Hee.  That’s not much of a threat, because you don’t have one.

Rainman

Tom Cruise looks like Rainman for reals.   Ironic and sad.   Kate looks so pleased because he just rattled off the code for next week’s Powerball.   Ha.   I don’t even know what the hell that means.   Start over.   Kate looks so pleased because he just cracked the code for Linear A.   

Whorly Has No Arse

The other day I was kind enough to make an accounting of Whorly’s exploits on a vintage motorcycle (or whatever the hades that ding is) for you.  Here he is trying to get that rusty bitch to start.   

* Boxers!

Greese

I’m going to call them Greese for short, because typing Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal takes too much out of my fingers.  Okay not really.   Are these two still sort of dating?  Is this the first picture of them in the same room at the same time?  Yawn.  I feel bad because I totally just forgot  what the name of the movie was that they are both in.    Where they fell in looooooove.  

On This Day in History: September 10, 2007

* Anners is sick of seeing Kate Bozzy with her hair pulled back that tight.  Me thinks scalp issues are in her future.  Here’s Bozzy at the Toronto International Film Festival where she is pimping her movie “The Skinny Girl In The Park.”   Where the hell is Jamers?   I want him bad. 

1812:  The U.S. defeats a British Fleet at The Battle of Lake Erie during the War of 1812.  By the way, what a damned exciting and creative name for a war.   

1943:  WWII — German forces occupy Rome. 

1963:  20 African American students enter public schools in Alabama.  Progress, people.

1977:   Last execution by the guillotine in France.  

Crazy Slag Alert!

Nicole Richie looks crazy.   She also looks nice and approachable.  Still, she looks crazy.  She looks like that neighborhood lady who calls everybody ‘honey’ and buys her breakfast, lunch, dinner, and lottery tickets all at the same damn place.   And that place is usually called 7-11. 

Daily Quote, Illustrated

“Every sin is the result of a collaboration.”

[ Lucius Annaeus Seneca ] 

My, that’s a gorgeous cover shot, Heidi !

I’m not trying to be mean, but damn, that’s like the worst GD magazine cover I’ve ever seen in my life.  Is the average Cosmo Girl reader a slag with a giant mandible region or a mental patient or like, both?

P.S.  I love how her blurb on the cover says:  “What you don’t know about me and Spencer.”   First of all – it’s “Spencer and I.”  Grammar, slag!   Second of all, I know that you’re both extra special fuglies and that’s really all I need to know.

Don’t Try this at Home

Lack of food must be doing things to Renee’s mind.  Let’s hope these goggles don’t catch on.

Janers