Mildred Pierce

A camera captured the supernatural the other day!   Ha Ha.  Here is Joan Crawford’s Ghost taking a stroll in Paris.  I tease Dita because she scares the hell out of me with all the nostalgic shenanigans.  It’s not 1949, hobag!  You can still look all classic and stuffs, just um, stop looking so much like a bloody cartoon.  Does she have a damn victory garden in her backyard, too? 

P.S.  The world is not yet ready for the houndstooth print.

P.P.S.  Mildred Pierce was an awesome movie.  I even felt sorry for Joan Crawford’s character and everything and she was a total bytch in real life. 

For Stella:

For the Bitch :

 

Dear Paulie,

You have my express permission to hit Daners on da back of da head with those drumsticks for all the nasty things she said about you.   Feel free to beat the tar out of Janers, too, because she did that post that insinuated that you looked like SaMANtha Ronson.   The NERVE of those slags, Paul!  

By the way, the Banksaholics are in an uproar over your Mucha inspired tattoo.   I think it’s cute.  And I think you’re cute.  And I think we should do a shag.

* Did I really just compose this post?   ** Trovbs:  I added some more pics of my dear boyfriend becavse yov weren’t happy with this one.  SlagHo!

Harsh but funny

* Janers

Keira Knightley says the damndest things!

Seriously, I think someone in Keira Knightley’s camp is embedded with the Associated Press or something because every time she coughs, vomits, or stubs her big toe – there it is, ready and waiting for the world to digest.  

The latest:  Keira doesn’t know when menfolk are coming on to her.   So sayeth Keira:   “Dating is always a difficult thing.  And to tell you the truth, I’m so dim that I don’t notice when a guy is coming on to me anyway.  Subtlety absolutely doesn’t work with me – you have to be extremely blunt.”

Extremely blunt and extremely ugly!   Have you seen the Rup lately?  He looks like a nasty old rag!  (Sorry, I quote Pete Doherty because he is the greatest scholar of our time).

By the way, I believe the ’dim’ part.   Damn, she grates!  She also needs to shut her pie-hole already, because everything that comes out of it these days is rubbish.   Also, at the risk of  being gross, there is actually at least one way she really ought to know when a guy is “coming” onto her.   Or maybe she’s dimmer than she thinks she is. 

Am I sick in da head becavse I like this shirt?

It’d be nicer if the anthropomorphization of Herpes wasn’t wearing it, but I think it’s kind of cute.    

Cheery News for once

Mary-Louise Parker has just adopted a little baby girl.  In case any of you don’t know this is the woman that hobag Claire Danes screwed over.  She already has a 3 year old boy and I’m sure her two little ones will give her all the love and happiness that sleazebag Crudup never could.

Posted by Janers, the Hobby Horse Luva

The Brit has hit the fan

I think Britney Spears is ready for a change in her lifepath.   Have you ever been to Astrocenter.com?  They do readings and I think that maybe this would work for her.   All she has to do is enter the time of her birth, her email address and her credit card information, and her life trajectory should soon begin to trickle in the right direction.

Her manager, lawyer, talent and soul have all abandoned her ass!   That’s quite sad!  I’m not picking on her, I’m just reporting the facts.  If the astrological natal chart doesn’t work, there’s always Jesus.

By the way, who the hell works for this crazy slag?  Did none of them realize this was a bad time for a GD comeback?   You can’t make a damn comeback unless your ass went somewhere.   She took two years off and had kids.  She needs to go on a pilgrimage to Big Sur or something or wander in the desert with a burning cross in her hands.   She needs to fingerpaint her dreams.  Or start a garden.   Or join Oprah’s Book Club. 

 Whatever.  She needs to bloody CHANGE.  Then she can comeback.   Maybe. 

P.S. I heard that she just temporarily lost custody of her 2 kids to K-Fed.  Is this true?  I’ll see what pops up tomorrow. 

Sorcery

Guess who said this quote

“Weight is a big issue in Hollywood because I’m twice the size, height and everything else, of most of the girls who are going in to see the director for a part. When you realize that I am, at my size, one of the largest actresses there, you start to think, ‘I don’t think it’d be healthy for me to stay here much longer.’”

*  Janers

Daily Quote, Illustrated

“Junk is the ideal product… the ultimate merchandise.  No sales talk necessary.  The client will crawl through a sewer and beg to buy.”

[ William S. Burroughs  ]

Freddy Kruger

When I get bored, I get stupid.   By the way, Diane Kruger is not newsworthy.  I just share this picture of her with you because that camera dude in the back is making me all sorts of nervous. 

On This Day in History: September 18, 2007

A.D. 96: Roman Emperor Domitian is assassinated.  Nerva becomes emperor.  He was old as hell.

323:  Constantine The Great becomes sole Emperor of Rome after he defeats Licinius at the Battle of Chrysopolis.  He’s my favorite.

1830:  A damn horse beats the first U.S. Locomotive in a race near Baltimore.

1932:  Peg Entwistle commits suicide by jumping off the “H” in the Hollywood Sign.  She was disillusioned by her lack of success in Hollywood, and I think the very next day she received an acting job offer in the mail.   Irony is jagged little pill. 

1970:  Jimi Hendrix dies in London.