Hot Bytch Alert !

My boyphriend is so bloody hot.   And I like the beginnings of the stache.  So sessy.  I’m probably going to stop posting pap pics of him because he’ll probably hold it against me in case we ever want to take things to the next level.  Hahahahaha!  

Peep Them Boots !

I don’t give an eph about  Good Charlotte or their girlfriends and baby momma’s, so I won’t bother naming these peoples.   Look at her boots, though!   Are those cool or fug or slutty or all of the above?   Me kinda likes them.     

She Looks Embarrassed

As she should, as she should!   Here’s Eva Longoria at the Arclight Cinema premiere of her brand stupid new “film” Over Her Dead Body.   It’s a movie about some slag who died and interferes with her boyfriend’s new relationships.  I think.   I’m just guessing.  It’s going to blow harder than the Santa Ana Winds.  That I know for sure, no guessing.

Re-Re Boyphriend Alert !

When Kate Bosworth first met her boyfriend, James Rousseau  (who by the way, is a descendant of philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau ), he didn’t have an ephing clue who the hell she was.   Maybe he thought she was a sprite, a wood nymph or a crackhead.   Actually, his ignorant ass thought she was Kate Hudson.  Hahahaha. 

This didn’t piss her off in the slightest (would piss me off, though), though.  It actually made her enormously happy!   Says Kate:    ”He had no idea who I was. He said, ‘You’re an actress? You’re not Kate Hudson, are you?’ For a little while there he called me Miss Hudson as a joke.”

Yeah, so she was pleased that he wasn’t trying to use her for her ‘celebrity’.   She doesn’t realize that the only people who know who the hell she is are us slags who perv over Orlando Bloom,  saw Blue Crush, or visit the Skinny Website. 

Sorcery

This Isn’t An Intervention (okay, maybe)

Britney Spears’ family finally put their feets down and staged something of an intervention this morning.   Slag is a fighter and she did not take this shit lying down.  The Ambulance was called and  once again, she was whisked off to the hospital.   Mental health issues.  This time it was UCLA, and not Cedars-Sinai, though.   They probably were trying to throw off Dr. Phil’s demented ass. 

Soon as Spears is released, her family is taking her to Louisianna.  The lawyer representing Brit’s family said this:   “Lynne is extremely concerned for her daughter and would like to take Britney back home to Louisiana and get her out of Hollywood. Brit has an amazing support system in Louisiana. Lynne was holding up reasonably well, but her first priority and concern right now is with her daughter and helping her through this very tough situation that she is in.”

This photo made me cry after it made me laugh.

Sorcery

Nonsense

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.   People, this is why Kate Bosworth gets featured here sort of maniacally.   I need to keep tabs on this wayward slag!   She did, after all, work her charms on Orlando for like, almost five deadly years.   Those were rough years for me.  Lots and lots of bitter, salty tears.   I was thrilled when they first broke up back in early 2005.   Then they got back together like eight months later and I was back to clawing the dirt and sobbing like an irrepairably damaged bytch.   It was even worse this time, because it was like they had some ridiculous bond that could never be broken. 

The bond ephing broke!!  They split up again in 2006 and I shamelessly giggled like a fiend.   I’m serious.   Ha!  It’s been over a year now… thank you, Kate, for keeping your spiny fingers off my man and shacking up with James Rousseau. 

* There is no sane reason for this post.  I’m just trying to justify the title of this blog again.  I want to change it, but I don’t think I will.

Ephing Boo !

This wankeress may or may not be shagging my boyphriend, Orlando Bloom.   Boo squared!   Sorry, I’m emotional.  And I hates her!

Leave My Boyphriend Alone

Poor baby!   Orlando got trashed this weekend and I am pissed!   Some dumb slag had the ephing gall to take a picture of him with her cellphone when he was preoccupied with a phonecall.   He told her arse off!   Hahahahahahaa.   He asked her to delete it.   Persistenly.  Then he got flip when he realized he was dealing with a re-re moron.  She decided not to delete it and she also decided to send it to a pap site.  Here’s her stupid ass text to them: 

“I was picking up food when I noticed him inside, then he went outside to talk on phone, when I came out he was having a heated argument with someone on phone. i walked by with my phone camera and took a grainy picture. He ran up behind me and said would you please delete that and he stood there looking at my phone. I showed him the picture was grainy and then asked for a picture with him he said it doesn’t work like that. I said I see how it works, thanks man! As he continued yelling on the phone!!!”

Hahhahahahha!   I love him for this!   Anyway I’m not going to post any photos from this shit and the pap crew that harrassed his arse.  Too sad.  I mean, he tried to cover his face with his coat– he obviously wasn’t in the mood!

Here are some of the hot comments:

1. . . . But I’m sure he is upset his career is going to shit. The guy is pretty much irrelevant in Hollywood I don’t know why he still lives there. He’s a joke. It doesn’t matter if he hides his face or not his paparazzi photos don’t sell either way.  It’s not that she took a picture, it’s that she is playing the role of a jilted fan because he didn’t agree to have another pic taken. He was in a bad mood. Anyone with half a brain would have left him alone. That is, unless she was trying to provoke him to get an even more valuable picture.
2. You people who are dissing him are a bunch ugly haters! Leave him alone and let him live his life for good sake! Just because he refused one picture when he has been undoubtably kind to all other fans doesnt mean hes a loser. The girl should of had common sense to back off when she realized he was arguing on the phone and OBVIOUSLY not in the mood. And as far as not having a movie lined up, he said himself that he wanted to take a break from film after POTC3 so read up on whoever your bashing before you talk your s*!t. Not to mention that he just lost a good friend so its not out of the norm to be easily aggitated. Leave him alone and find another Britney Spears to follow. Hes not a drunk and not down the same road as Heath so get a life.
3. She wasn’t bothering him! She just took a photo and I don’t think that’s classified as bothering someone!
4.  It’s not stalking and perhaps it’s not even bothering someone to snap a photo with her cell phone upon seeing the unbelievably gorgeous Bloom. What it is, however, is just fucking RUDE, and most of you tweeny people were brought up with absolutely no manners whatsoever and have this huge sense of entitlement, that the world owes you something and anything is free game–even someone’s fucking dignity– if you can get your grubby little mitts on it. Take your rude asses to charm school and learn some goddamn manners and respect for other people and some common fucking decency. This man has more decency and manners in his perfect little pinkie finger than most people have in their entire being. You haven’t a clue the kind of stuff he’s put up with, and with a smile and a kind word. It took something like this to make him lose it, and its the fact that the girl INTRUDED on his personal private space and time. He has ever right to expect fans not to do that.
5. Awww. Whats the matter Orli? Surly, irritated and embarassed that you’re apparently one of the few “A-Listers”(coughcough)not invited to the SAG Awards and the afterparties that night? You know, the awards that “matter more than the Oscars” because its being recognized by other actors? Afraid that your peers don’t want to celebrate and hobknob with you anymore? For a guy to whom status and being held in high regard by those that matter(not his fans hint hint)means more than anything, its gotta sting a bit.  But never fear, Aileen was there to babysit you and take you out to dinner and a movie to take your mind off it.  Funny that she wasn’t there with her other client Linney…but Ms. Linney is a grown woman and doesn’t need handholding.
6. Orlando I have to you admit you have been acting odd lately, and even I am beginning to think your over need to hide from the cameras is a little bite stupid, and it just makes you appear a little less attractive to me.
7. people who hate orlando need to shut the fuck up.
8. He has no girlfriend you not god fan!!! He is pure. I only like him for his acting but you no lie he say no he have no girlfriend!
9. He is alive!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy I cry myself to sleep every night worrying about him! Who cares if he is a jerk to fans and people around him all I care is to see pictures of my future husband!!!
10. He needs to go away! I dont get why people are still this guys fans. He has proven himself over and over again to be a jerk just because he took a private jet to visit some starving children in Nepal for a day or two for a photo op and flies back on his private jet to his hollywood eating out every meal life doesnt erase that he left his friends hurt in a car accident. No amount of PR is going to fix that unless he comes out and says he is sorry to those women in public.
11. Isn’t it funny that Orlando Bloom did everything to cover his face – - well, maybe because he doesn’t want to look ugly on papz pictures – - but turned out he has the ugliest picture around now. Just look at the first picture wherein he was trying to cover his face hahaha so funny!

Shag or Gag ?

It’s James McAvoy.  Do your bidding or whatever.

Woot ! Accelerate !

REM are doing a small North American tour to support their new album, Accelerate.   I love me some REM, but I think I’m a bad fan because I ain’t listened to shit since that Reveal album like six or seven years ago.   Maybe I”ll go.    I’ll do the Berkeley show and I’ll show up in my Cola Gorda T-shirt.      

* Click HERE for tour dates.

Source:  Starpulse News

He Still Gives Me The Heebie Jeebies…

Wish I Was There !

Jessica Simpson (pictured, right) and her boyphriend, Tony Homo went to a place called Metal Skool the other night and did some bad Karaoke wit this dude.   It’s all you can expect from the two of them, really.   In case you don’t know who they are, he plays football, has a round head, and used to date Carrie Underwood.  She used to be on a reality show and she’s famous for having a creepy in the head father named Joe, and younger sister with acid reflux.   

* One of my barbie’s had pants like that dude’s on the left.   Oh damn!  Is he wearing a chastity belt?