There Is No Gawd!
My boyfriend took his dingo out for a walk the other day, and to add insult to injury that walk took place in my old stomping grounds. Eph you, Whorelando Bloom! Venice Beach was mine. And your dingo dresses really stupid. Skinny jeans and gold ballet phlats: how original. By the way, if I could reach through this computer screen and punch you in the face, I so would!
Just kidding. But this really hurts me. Some people have to live crappy lives and some get to shag Orlando Bloom despite having dingo DNA coursing through their blood.
There’s more carnage!
^
^ Lice!
^ Kissing a fool.
^ Me no like Dingo.
I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I think that I’m going to cry. Loudly. Thank God I live alone and there’s only the kangaroos behind my house to be scared at the noise.
(Those jeans are hideous btw. No one can get away with wearing high waisted pants, no matter how tall and skinny one is.)
joders
March 25, 2008 at 1:01 AM
I think he needs a shower.
Heidi Leather Thong
March 25, 2008 at 1:16 AM
For days I’ve been studiously deleting my Google alerts about this AND NOW YOU POST IT ON YOUR BLOG!
Thanks. Gawd.
I will have my revenge. Against him, not you.
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 3:12 AM
She has a camel toe and I’m not even going to begin on his outfit.
It’s not fair though, she grew up in Hicksville and prob can’t count to ten but she gets to live in New york apartment, travel the world and get paid a shitload. All people should be living shitty lives like us!
jane121
March 25, 2008 at 3:54 AM
Those jeans are hideous, fo sho! They look painfully tight.
And, amen, Janers Amen
Daners Isadora Is Phucking Phierce!
March 25, 2008 at 7:32 AM
It isn’t fair I tell you, it just isn’t fair! Why her?! WHY!?! She’s… She’s… well, she’s got bad fashion sense! And her face looks like a ferret! *wails*
*sniffs* …Heads will roll for this. I will not be happy until I have her ferret-like head on a platter.
Cait
March 25, 2008 at 8:39 AM
How did I miss that heinous camel toe at first glance? Yikes!
Kellers
March 25, 2008 at 9:45 AM
i like the jeans!!!!!!!
where is the cameltoe? haahhahhaa. i cant see it.
ahhaha i love your name heidi leather thong. HIHI:D
Ugg
March 25, 2008 at 9:48 AM
That’s some of the best acting I’ve seen Whorely do in quite some time. Really, all these little pap sightings are like little vignettes, giving up exactly what he wants you to see. Somebody said that the Venice pics felt like a “redo” for the Ducati pics. I think so too. He may have looked pissed about the paps, but dingo took the time to stop and wave. WTF. So, time for take #2.
Totally think we’re being played, just not sure why he feels the need. The effect to me is the opposite of you folks, it’s starting to bore me. No drama, no angst, just all BS.
Why does he have to play it that way?
Sadie Jo
March 25, 2008 at 9:49 AM
Yeah…I kinda agree with Sadie Jo. Funny how this all comes up at the same time he announces new movie projects.
It still hurts though. *sniff*
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 10:06 AM
POOOOR WANDAAAA *HUGS*
Ugg
March 25, 2008 at 11:01 AM
he has to stand on the pavement thing because she is a giraffe. FUNNY
Ugg
March 25, 2008 at 11:02 AM
*HUGS*
Is he wearing Sketchers? I have a pair just like that….
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 11:25 AM
* Wanda, I had to battle with myself for a few minutes on whether or not to post these. The truth needed to be told. SOwwy.
* SadieJo I think you’re on to something… by the way these are things I do with my gay male friends: check their hair for lice and kiss them at gas stations.
Hey, I just noticed that Orly has a weird ass bruise on his wrist? Why? Are you okay, Orlando? Did the dingo bite you?
* Haha, Cait! A ferret?!
Anners Scribonia
March 25, 2008 at 11:37 AM
Nobody said anything about my new avatar.
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 12:20 PM
Ur new avie is hawt.
What is it?
Daners Isadora Is Phucking Phierce!
March 25, 2008 at 1:21 PM
It’s Hong Kong Phooey jumping out of a filing cabinet.
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 1:32 PM
completely agree with Jane, this world is not fair if cougars and dingos without brain can attack and eat little innocent yummyguys…
mi condolences to anners and all the fans of orly for his bad taste and terrible attitude. Again if you need help with ropes and stuff. Ill be happy to help
Zu
March 25, 2008 at 1:37 PM
Jajajajajajajajajaja! Wanda that is awesome
Daners Isadora Is Phucking Phierce!
March 25, 2008 at 1:53 PM
Just wait until you see my new post. I think the editors at Blogcritics are checking with their lawyers before they approve it.
Wanda Rizzuto
March 25, 2008 at 2:00 PM
Lemmie know when it’s up,yo!
Daners Isadora Is Phucking Phierce!
March 25, 2008 at 2:38 PM
Yes, Anners. A Ferret!
http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l155/IntrepidLlama/dingHO.jpg
Notice the wide-spread eyes. The wonky nose. The rodent-like smile.
Meh. I may have to stop comparing her with a ferret. That ferret is SO much cuter!
Cait
March 25, 2008 at 3:25 PM
She may not be stupid (but prob is) but we know it wasn’t brains that got her all that money and showed her the world. Actually, Whorlando is the male version of her.
It sucks to be norming looking! I want money without having to spend years at university and then about 10 working for that decent promotion.
bored hobag
March 25, 2008 at 3:33 PM
wheee. this thread was forwarded in my google alerts. Now peeps all around the globe can get a clue about the dangers of a woman scorned by her dingho-lurving (ex) boyphriend.
I get a certain satisfaction from knowing that phrases like “ferret-faced dingo” are being translated into many different languages. Like Swedish, and Swahili, and Chom.
Sadie Jo
March 25, 2008 at 6:21 PM
A ferret crossed with Brendan Fraser. Booyah!
* SadieJo! Google alerts…. that’s big and scary news… ha… ferret-faced dingo prob looks cool in Swahili.
Anners Scribonia
March 25, 2008 at 6:57 PM