First zoo trip
The first clear pictures of baby Nahla have appeared. Her mom Halle recently took her on trip to Los Angeles zoo - despite being only 5 months old she looks like a bundle of energy ready to jump right out of mom’s arms. She’s adorable and quite unique looking for a baby (they always seem to look the same at this age). I bet she’s going to grow up to be quite a stunner, especially with the blue eye/brown skin combo.
Too many lolz
Heidi Montag is either a complete moron or an ingenious democrat. I’ve seen plenty of celebrities endorse a candidate before but I’ve never seen one do so much in order to sink an election campaign. When asked about who McCain will chose as Vice President Heidi replied; “I am McCain’s vice president! Go team!”
This has to be the 5th time this month I have seen an article which mentions both Heidi Montag and John McCain in the same paragraph. I’m starting to feel sorry for the guy – the shame must be immense.
Surely she must know that anyone associated with her instantly loses credibility which can never be regained? Oh well, to be honest with you I don’t think Heidi Montag really deserves less respect than the person McCain actually did select for VP.
There just aren’t enough crackheads in Alaska
Celebrities and politics sure are an interesting mix. Here’s what Diddy had to say about John McCain’s vice presidential nominee pick (Sarah Palin):
“John you are bugging the f— you. I don’t even understand what planet you’re on now. This is the job to be the leader of the free world. No disrespect, I love ya, I want you to live to 110, but what if, God forbid, you got a running mate, you become President. Alaska? ALASKA? ALASKA? ALASKA? Come on, man. I don’t even know if there are any black people in Alaska. John, come on. Sarah [Palin]? What in the hell? ALASKA? You’re bugging the f— out. Sarah Palin, you ain’t ready to be vice president. ALASKA MOTHERF—-ER? What is the reality in Alaska? There aren’t even any crackheads in Alaska. There aren’t no black people in Alaska.”
As usual I don’t have a clue what he is on about. How does one manage to get so rich without ever learning to put a decent sentence together? and more importantly how can I go about becoming rich without having to learn such basics?
Anyway back to the subject at hand – what do crackheads have to do with anything? Is a politician not truly qualified until they’ve spent a week with Amy Winehouse? I have so much to learn in the world of politics.
Tilda Swinton Says She’s Not An Actress
Says Tilda: “. . . I’m not really an actress because the more I know about what real actors are subjected to within the film-making process, I’m not one at all.”
Yeah, so what the eph is she? I wonder what she checks off as her occupation on her tax statements? If you earn your living acting, I’m gonna have to go ahead and call your ass an actress, okay?
Tilda also said this: “I don’t choose roles, I choose people. I’ve never chosen a role in my life. The idea is an anathema to me. That’s why I saw I’m not a proper actress because I’ve heard other actors talking about how they have to fight to be part of the conversation and I’ve never had that experience. I choose the person and then we’ll decide what we’re going to do together and magically it will appear four years later.”
Who bloody cares? So you don’t choose roles, you choose people. That’s nice! Still an actress!
Tilda was the white bytch witch in The Chronicles of Narnia. She was also in The Deep End, and a movie called Orlando. You may not recognize her because her face tends to disappear or something.
* It’s sooooooo boring out there in gossips. Some celebretard needs to do something re-re already…
This Is Not Tina Fey
Sarah Palin is John McCain’s last ditch attempt to limp his way into the white house. He’s a right greedy bytch, by the way! Doesn’t he already have like seven GD houses? The White House will be his eighth property.
John McCain is the great great great great great grandson of Cain, the son of Adam, who killed his brother, Abel in the Bible. Hence the ‘cain’ in his last name. He’s just that old! I don’t know where the ‘MC’ part comes from. Nor do I care!
I like how his vice president choice looks like a rabid human resource manager from Macy’s circa 1993. I’d probably have more faith in her qualifications if she had been plucked from department store human resource obscurity. Governor of Alasska, huh? That’s the “experience” that makes one fit for the highest office in the land? That’s like saying you were head bytch at your high school newspaper and thus, you’re ready to rule the New York Times.
LAME.
Tyranosaurus Rexy Is The Sessiest Lingerie Model Evers!
In additon to being fickle bytch faces, the slags behind the Agent Provocateurlabel are compilers of lame lists! Over the years they’ve had tons of hot slags procuring drawers for them and they thought it’d be real cute to pay them back by having skanks vote on which of them is the “sexiest lingerie model ever“. Ha!
Katers Mosswon top hobag, and rightly so. Katers is the sexiest, rexiest mofo ever. It was some nasty video she did for AP that clinched it: “In the four films starring Kate, we are given dream sequences that invite us to imagine how we might fulfil her desires. The dreams are beautifully crafted fantasies, each with an eerie atmosphere that brings us into a serene la-la land where we feel free to imagine pleasing Kate.”
I know how I can fulfill Katers’ desires. I can arrive at her doorstep each and every morning with a jaunt in my step and a basket full of freshly cooked crack.
She Makes Me Dizzy
Lauren Cornbread kills me. Really, she does. Slag is always running around like a hairdresser on fire. She’s just so busy. Really busy. Here’s Lauren rushing off to a dead serious meeting at CBS. CBS means ‘Cockamamie Bull Shiz’.
Oh, here is London Lauren Cornbread
. . .You are repressed
But you’re remarkably dressed (at least she thinks she is)
Is it Real ? (No!)
And you’re always busy (doing absolutely nothing)
Really busy
Busy, busy
Oh, hairdresser wannabe fashion designer on fire
All around Sloane Square Robertson Boulevard
And you’re just so busy (doing nothing)
Busy, busy
Busy scissors sunglasses
Oh, hairdresser fake fashion designer on fire
Was a client Kitson, over-cautious
They made you nervous
And when they said
“I’m gonna sue you drop your fashion line”
Oh, I really felt for you …mmm… (No I didn’t)
I apologize for this re-re post. Really; I’m sorry.
* I took the liberty of adapting the lyrics to Morrissey’s stellar song to suit my lame purposes:
What In The Hobby Horse Hell Is Keira Wearing?!
It’s not so much phugly as it is unnecessarily matronly and weird. I need a better look at those GD shoes, though. They might actualy be cool, but knowing Keirers they probs is not! Also, they make her head look big.
There is a story (sorta) that comes attached to this churlish wardrobe nit-picking! Seems as though Keirers believeth that the paps have ruined her social life. Plain and simple, her phriends don’t invite her to hang out with them because they don’t want to be tailed by shutterbuggers.
Keirers told Tatler magazine that: “One of them (friends) asked me if I would mind not going out with them to a restaurant one evening as they find the whole paparazzi thing alarming. I don’t blame them. It can be very intimidating.”
Or maybe they’re just embarrassed by the way the beautiful Hobby Horse chooses to clothe her bod sometimes. She looks like nutter sometimes, but therein lies her charm. For me at least. I can appreciate a hobby horse on the edge.
Also, her friends are right proper arsejoles! They should be willing to weather the storm if the payoff is that they get to spend time with their dear buddy, the melancholic hobby horse.
Christina Ricci Trimming Rose Bushes
Here’s some pictures of Christina Ricci trimming the rose bushes in her front yard with actual scissors. Slag doesn’t understand that pruning shears were birthed for this sole purpose.
Posts like this happen when there ain’t no gossip in the universe.
Dear Cola Gorda,
I see that you have completed your HOlena Christenphuck-inspired metamorphosis into Norman Reedus. Boo!
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