Kate | Blogsworth

Because the following tale sucks, I thought I’d cheer it up a bit with a pic of Lindsay Lohan being a normal girl.  Are booze and drugs really more fun than rollerblading in Venice Beach?  Me thinks not.

Anyway, Linds is in big troubs at Rehab because she got tested for drugs and wah-lah, drug usage showed up in the results!   Apparently this pissed her off because, at some point during the test, she  “screamed and cursed at the medical director before storming out of the room.”   Oooh, that’s scary.  

Oh and there’s more trash:   Linds also got caught doing the hokey pokey in the bathroom with a fellow drug abuser.   ‘Hokey pokey’ is a polite term for you know what.   Nasty.

Sorcery

I actually think that Hayden Panettiere is kinda cute and I’m hoping she won’t become the next Lindsay Lohan but I am pissed off that she gets to be in Paris right now and I am stuck at home in my pyjamas.

Janers

Nicole Ritchie surrendered to serve her 4 day jail sentence and was released after less than 2 hours. The statement said she was released “based on her sentence and federal court guidelines.” Under the current sheriff’s policy, non-violent female offenders sentenced to 30 days or less are booked and released within 12 hours.

I’m not thinking that Nicole is a real danger to society and considering she is carrying a baby this was probably for the best but this better not happen to Blohan.

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Posted by: Janers

This is what Lindsay Lohan has to say about her headline-grabbing antics:  “I feel like the asshole, the idiot, because I feel like I’m distracting from the other things that are important, like global warming and that kind of stuff. . . I genuinely mean that.  And I don’t know what to do.”

Um…. you izz an asshole, girl!   What the hell?!  You don’t know what to do?  Try to stop being one!   Grrr.

P.S.  This is my favorite picture of LL!  I was going to post one of the infamous “Knife Pics,” but that seemed soooo obvious. 

Sorcery

After failing to get anymore cash out of his troubled daughter, Michael Lohan is planning on suing Lindsay’s former bodyguard who dished on the what the family situation was like when he was working for Lindsay. Tony Almeida (the ex-bodyguard) alleged Michael and Dina Lohan were wild, abusive, neglectful, party-loving people who needed to keep their “cash cow” daughter working to pay the bills. He also said that Lindsay’s father was addicted to drugs and was both physically and emotionally abusive.

I’m still pissed at Lindsay for putting other people’s lives in danger with her drink driving but you gotta feel sorry for the poor lass.

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I’ve never been a Lohan fan, in fact, I despised her for representing my generation so badly but only now that she is locked up in rehab do I realise how much I took her for granted. What is a gossip hobag to do without pictures of young starlets passed out in the back (or behind the wheel) of a car at 5am?

Posted by: Janers

Ha Ha.   I must admit I’m sick for enjoying every single word of this story I just read about Lindsay Lohan!  It’s almost too cool to be real!   I’ll just give you the highlights ‘cuz I’m real tired right now, but according to Lindsay, the Crackhead Hobag:    

Sienners Miller is a “no talent crackhead,” Keira Knightley is a “flat, shallow, cardboard cutout of an actress,” and Scarlett Johansson is “fat and ugly.”   Oh, and last (and most definitely least), Lindsay Lohan is: “The greatest actress in the world!” 

Sorcery

[ Epictetus ]

* Oops! Too late, Linds!

Looks like Louis Vuitton is pissed at Linsday Lohan for stealing a bunch of their stuff from an Elle shoot. Apparently she kept shoving stuff into her bag only to have a stylist’s assistance take it back out. She then kept on trying to nick stuff, walked out and refused to return any calls.

Honestly, she reminds me of those 2 year olds that grab everything they see and say ‘mine’ over and over again while you try and explain that it is indeed, not theirs. You eventually have to prise it out of their grubby fingers. Too bad Lindsay would probably scratch your face off or have her bodyguard beat you down if you tried this.  

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Posted by: Janers

Judge Judy had the following to say about the troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan:

“If you are dumb enough and arrogant enough or immature enough to place other people’s lives in danger you have to be punished. Seriously, I’m not playing around. She is not the victim – the public is the victim because it is the public that is at risk.

“If the young community sees that we are more worried about Lindsay Lohan than we are about the people who have to dodge out of the way of her car, being driven erratically, that’s not where our emphasis should be. When you place other people’s lives at risk there are serious consequences. If you drive a car and we’ve taken away your privilege of driving a car then you have to go to jail. You don’t have to go to jail forever but you have to go to jail until it hurts.”

AMEN!

I am actually starting to feel sorry for the poor lass, flushing her life down the toilet at such a young age but lets not forget that drink driving is a very serious crime that places the safety of others in jeopardy.

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Posted by: Jane

I’m sure you’ve heard all about Lindsay Lohan getting arrested early this mawrnin’ because… she was driving under the influence and was spotted chasing some car in Santa Monica or something.  I bet you’re all on TMZ!!   I need to start going to bed earlier so I can catch some breaking news once in a while.  Anyway, once I get my head together I’ll iron over the details.  

This girl is a bloody MESS!   I knew that Calum Best break-up would push her ass over the edge!   Oops!  There I go blaming someone’s bad on somebody else again!   You get the idear!   Those extra days in Rehab suuuuure paid off!    Anyway, Linds got booked and was released and last I heard she will be arraigned in August and is presently in rehab.  

Be back in a few.  

Lindsay Lohan is committed to her sobriety by wearing an alcohol momitoring ankle bracket and we all know it’s pretty hard to resist a few drinks whilst you’re out in the surf.

I’m guessing by the heels that she is actually about to party rather than take a dip in the ocean. Wearing a bikini with a pair of gold heels to an event always means class.

Posted by: Jane