Dear Diuhre-re

Deere Diuhre-re!  

Itt izz eye, Miranduh Kairr.  Duuu!   Okai, sew eye half binnn theenking uhlowtt latelee thatt eye shood scay summthink:  ‘summthink’.  Hawhawhaw!   Eye have joques  —  Evin soopermodills halfve joques!   MayB thaat iss Y Whorelandowe fanseez mee sew muwch.  ??? !!!!  Or may-B becuzz I halve speshil stuph goeing onn underr meye skurt.  Askkk Tulah ubowt ittt…     

Okayy sew whuwt eye wontid 2 scay whuz thattt eye amm reellyy diccipowntid bigh howe ower latistt pap shotts plaid ort in Lundign.   firct thinks firsct, Suhmanthur Bloorm wasnrt sapposeta B thayre.   N Whorelandowe scertunlee wasrnt supposetar wholed herr hannde. !!!!!!!!!  Fissle phuckeree, I thoart thatt wuz weerd.  That reeelly pisced mee orff!!!   Eye im thuh gurlfrinde.  O-kayyyy?!   Ewe wholed meye pawws N Kno-won elscize.   Duuuh! Pluss, itt wuz meye mo-mint!

Thaanc Gawrd eye halfve uh dorggee to cummfort mee.

Tilll necszt thyme,

Yorse trooolee, 

MKay  

P. Ess.  Whorelandow isz knot starrink N a feelm witth Keir-ugh (!) Nitely.  Az iph eye wood uhlow itt!   *wink*

Author: Anners Scribonia

Bitters.

11 thoughts on “Dear Diuhre-re”

  4. I’ve seen that terrified look before in the eyes of that poor dog. Oh yeah, it’s the same eyes Whorelando has when he’s with Mirandingo.

    “Please don’t squeeze the life out of me with your dingo-paws. I’ll do anything you say. Somebody help me!”

    Looks like a call into the ASPCA is warranted here.

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  6. I love how Dingoese just flows off the tongue.

    BTW, Whorelando and Olivier Martinez had another little rendezvous in Seville. Dingo must be spittin fur.

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  7. See! I told you Whoreley and Olivier were rubbing sausages! It was only a matter of time before she found comfort in the arms of another canine.

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  8. Dude, that was difficult to read. I could just hear that voice though and it kinda made me want to break things.

    LOL, Lundign.

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