A Dingo In The Throes Of Passion

31397pcn_kerr_39

The dingo loves attention.  And a whole flock of wetodds gave it to her when they showed up at her latest cheap gig for David Jones, the department store in Australia which has been cursed with finding work for her awkward ass to do.   More than three whole people showed up when the dingo showed up to (dis)grace the “Half-Yearly Clearance Sale” (Mama Therese, Daddy Kerr, and The Emperor Nero aka Poostain aka lil bro’ Matty) and that fact sent the dingo’s pleasure receptors into overdrive.

Or maybe more than three didn’t show up?!   The head bytch in charge at David Jones, a feller named Jason Mc Vicar told the whole wide world that, “Traditionally the half-yearly clearance in winter doesn’t have the same crowds as the Boxing Day sales. It’s darker and colder.”

Yeah?  So is the dingwhore’s heart, Jason.  So is the the dingwhore’s heart.

Mr. McVicar went on to say some more shiz like this:  “I think every person’s situation is different but certainly people are definitely after value for money in these economic times.”

… which is why he hired a cheap  dingo.

Sorcery

31397pcn_Kerr
Stupid Outfit from John Mark Carr's Jon Benet Ramsay Collection.
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86 thoughts on “A Dingo In The Throes Of Passion

  1. This bytch makes me so mad and soooo stupid that I’m reduced to a blethering fool. I just want her to go away.

    She is ridiculously skinny and she’s gone all lollypop looking with a bobble head and dead eyes.

    Great, a bobble headed, dead eyed, dingHo cabbage. Just what I always wanted.

    Like

  2. jaded4good

    It must be a talent that is contagious. No two pieces of garment fit together. Amazing.

    I have a skirt just like that, except it looks good. I bought it second hand two years ago.

    Like

  3. PoorOrlando

    I am speechless, I am without speech! I winced when I saw that face likes she’s trying to catch flies or something. And what is with the way she always stands with her legs as wide open as possible? Does she need to air it out?

    She’s too skinny, too ugly, and too annoying. Please somebody quarantine her in the southern hemisphere. Let’s spread a rumor she has the swine flu, so no country will let her in, especially the U.S. and the U.K.!

    “A bobble headed, dead eyed, dingHo cabbage.” Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha – Joders! You’re so funny.

    Like

  4. Akeelers Spielberg

    Hey! Speaking of Roman caesars, I had my friends over last weekend to watch the unrated version of Caligula, they all left my house traumatized. LOL Helen Mirren was a hot slag!

    Like

  5. CO

    HI,
    I saw pics of the adorable Orlando recently in without her dingo-ness and he looked sooooo happy and free! I hope he is dingo-less my year’s or worlds’ end. You guys are Funny, funny, funny as usual. I think she is attempting to cough up a fur ball.

    Like

  6. ducati

    @ Mystic: coffee meet keyboard.
    If that’s her “O” face, I hope that whorly keeps the lights off, save electricity and all.

    Like

  7. jaded4good

    I would like to protest against that presumption in the name of all feline creatures, big or small.

    Like

  8. neely o'hara

    WHY oh why is she so freaking fugly? Couldn’t Orlandum have found a halfway-decent looking box to bang? Jeez, this is giving me a headache. I’d have a bit more respect – just a bit mind you – if this girl was even slightly attractive but I just don’t see it! Gah, Orly has no taste these days! Greaseball City, here we come.

    Like

  9. Mystic

    Someone met the dingho and almost died from excitement:

    “I MET HER!!!! at Broome Airport when picking up my friend, all I can say is she is just as beautiful and polite in real life, I’m still totally star struck. Orlando was getting their luggage like they were of normal status, no bodyguards and no annoying fans/paparazzi, well except me tehe!! we had a photo in the toilets quickly, I’m so glad I met my idol, so surreal! Not to mention Orlando being there too. “

    Like

  10. Anners Scribonia

    Oh, jeebus. You have cool friends if they actually sat through Caligula. Especially the unrated Penthouse version. Helen Mirren was hot, tho.

    Like

  11. Anners Scribonia

    Isn’t she supposed to be a friggin’ supamodill? Why does she look like shit in all of her clothes?

    Like

  12. Anners Scribonia

    They met the dingo at “Broome” airport? Why did they not sweep her ass up and throw her away forever?!

    Great idol, by the way.

    ;)

    Like

  13. jaded4good

    She’s a panty model, she’s supposed to look good in underwear. But then again, there is a reason why call her SWF.

    Like

  14. jaded4good

    A halfway-decent looking or otherwise decent would have dumped his sorry arse the first time he went to party with a whole bunch of skanky looking females instead of her.

    Like

  15. joders

    Nooooooo, Poor Orlando, not the Southern Hemisphere! It’s bad enough that she was birthed in a cabbage patch down here, without sending her back. My life will be over! Unless New Zealand will take her in.

    Like

  16. ezebel

    Hmmm…the yearly clearance sale…isn’t that where they have stuff that’s cheap, no-one wants and that DJ’s are trying desperately to get rid of? No wonder she’s there.

    By the way, has anyone seen the incredibly gross and sleazy ad featuring guess who on this website? http://www.industrie.com.au

    Been waiting for one of you brilliant girls to write something on it since it made my skin crawl and my eyes bleed seeing it on Oz TV earlier this year. Pretty please!

    Like

  17. ezebel

    I wish she had died of excitement – anyone stupid enough to make someone like this their idol should not be allowed to procreate and pollute the gene pool.

    Like

  18. MK

    You guys are bunch of haters!

    Miranda is the best among her VS peers!

    And don’t compare her to Adriana and Doutzen cause Adriana is transvestite looking girl while Doutzen is a stupid bimbo who can’t even pronounce a single word correctly, plus the fact that she’s FAT!

    Like

  19. Oi, listen up MK. If Moronduh is the best that VS has to offer then the other girls must all be bushpigs and VS should be out scouting for other talent.

    Doutzen isn’t fat and if you think she is then I suggest you make an appointment with your optometrist. Of course Doutzen may appear morbidly obese if you compare her with Moronduh because Moronduh is so grossly underweight she makes Allegria Versace look fat.

    And perhaps Doutzen struggles with English because it’s not her first language. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Moronduh give an articulate or intelligent interview. Unfortunately for her she’s not able to use the “English isn’t my first language” excuse. She was raised speaking English and she still can’t get it right.

    Call me a hater if you want – if my dislike for Kerr makes me a hater, then I’ll happily wear that label. But frankly, I’m just saying it how it is.

    Like

  20. OMG!

    @MK
    That’s why VS gives Doutzen and Adriana all the good jobs, right? Oh, and why both of them have so many other jobs outside of VS- you know, besides second fiddle at a department store. Wow, it’s been almost 14 years and pity the fashion world still hasn’t noticed how “stunning” she is. HAHAHA.

    Me thinks you are a bit delusional. I can’t wait to see how Jessica Hart does with VS. Bahahaha.

    Like

  21. MK

    You guys are just jealous because until now, Orlando is still with Miranda! If it’s either Adriana or Doutzen who is dating Orlando, you’ll treat either of them with extreme animosity like with Miranda! Give it up… there’s nothing you can do now but to HATE.

    Like

  22. @MK

    LOL LOL LOL

    You might wanna check out the Harper’s Bazaar US edition, and be surprised on who’s on the cover… it’s Doutzen… sorry

    Like

  23. LOL@MK

    You wish sweetie. How about answering as to why if the cabbage patch kid is so stunning then she is hardly used and hardly has any REAL jobs?

    You wish people were justjealous but it’s really about the kind of person this lying bi!ch has exposed herself to be.

    But go on and delude yourself into thinking it’s all about jealously.

    Like

  24. Mystic

    If he dated Adrianna I really wouldn’t care cause she made it big on her own and didn’t need a movie star to do it. Doutzen is getting noticed on her own too.

    Like

  25. sweet bee

    Miranda doesn’t have anthing to be jealous of really, nobody here want her career nor her bf ,get over it .

    Like

  26. Ki-Ki

    MK: Why do I feel as though I’m talking to a 9 year-old?

    Whatever. I don’t want Orlando. He has an STD. (See the vocab Tab)

    Like

  27. Ummmmm, MK? You called Doutzen a stupid bimbo because she can’t even pronounce a single word correctly yet it appears you, are unable to formulate a proper sentence in English, yourself. Pot, meet kettle.

    Yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re all fatjellushaters. We’ve heard it all before.

    Run along back to Just Jared and / or Orlando Love, there’s a good girl.

    Like

  28. Akeelers Spielberg

    Yeah, I inadvertently posted my comment on another thread.

    @MK,

    You’re as stupid as me before I’ve had my morning coffee!

    Like

  29. MK

    Miranda is loved by most people, and she’s becoming a very popular model whether you haters like it or not!

    Like

  30. PoorOrlando

    Who is this MK chick? Hey, MK, go away, this site if just for intelligent people who get the joke.

    What a maroon.

    Like

  31. @MK

    Popular where? In her pretend world?

    Is she popular at DJ’s? If so why don’t they use her so much? And why do they pay her so little?

    Is she popular in the US? If so why does she always have to use Orlando’s name and why does she not have any good jobs? Most times she is “Not Pictured”.

    Is she popular with VS? If so why does AL and DK get all the good gigs?

    If she is so popular and in demand model why does she take low budget jobs with brands like XOXO?

    So please do back up your comments about how popular she is.

    Like

  32. @MK

    What do you mean by becoming a very popular model? She is 26 years old. It’s a bit late for that. If she hasn’t made it now she never will.
    Not only is that old age for a model but it’s not like her face is even holding up that well anyway.
    What kind of jobs do you really think she is going to get in the future?

    Like

  33. She’s becoming very popular? What the crap is taking her so long?

    Seriously though, where can I get an application to work for Team Cabbage? It must be a pretty lucrative gig for all of you to keep up the way you do, I mean camping on JJ all day long and what not. I do so admire your dedication. I wonder how she makes payroll every week though? Are you volunteers? Do you get to watch her and Whorely go at it a couple of times a week in exchange for your services? Huh?

    Eh, Anners, I think you were right. Nine years old.

    Like

  34. Mystic

    Slightly O/T but gotta share. There is a show on Nickelodeon called iCarly and its about three teens who do a comedy show on the internet. Anyway I was checking the new episodes and the one this Saturday is called ‘iTake on Dingo’ which of course made me laugh.

    Back to the schedule DingHo bashing.

    Like

  35. MK

    VS just got the services of Miranda for 3 consecutive launches! She has her own solo commercial for VS, and a line that are featured on high fashion magazines.

    Whether you haters like it or not, Miranda is becoming one of the favorites among VS angels, and many sites feature her!

    Like

  36. Miranda has been modelling since she was 13 years old. She’s now 26. She’s had 13 years to reach the dizzying heights of modelling success yet you say she’s only NOW becoming successful and a VS favourite? This is not a very compelling argument, MK.

    She’s veritably ancient in modelling terms, she’s not a supermodel and there’s no way she’ll still be working in 10 years like Heidi Klum, Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell, Cindy Crawford et al. They’re the real supermodels.

    You’re way out of your league here, MK. You need to catch the next boat back to your little shippers world.

    Like

  37. @MK

    MK you didn’t answer the questions, did you? You just spouted some BS about VS.
    No one said she didn’t work for VS but she is still their B(orC)team girl.
    Everyone knows that AL and DK and Ali all get the best gigs. Dingo did a couple of launches but if you compare those to what AL and DK do for VS it’s pathetic.

    How about DJ’s? Why is she paid so little? What about that they hardly use her?
    What other jobs is this girl getting after 13?
    What sites feature her? You mean some chessy blogs like drunkenstepfather?

    In the US mags she is ususally Miss Not Pictured.
    She is ANCIENT for a model.

    Like

  38. MK

    Ok to answer you questions:

    VS just featured Miranda on solo commercials and launches, and that means they like her. Now where does your beloved Doutzen leave that? She can’t even have a solo launch or commercial! And haven’t you haters noticed that Doutzen is like a living dead who likes to lick her lips every now and then during interviews… now that’s what i call tacky! Besides Doutzen is the FATTEST among her peers whether you guys like it or not.

    As for DJ, Miranda is shooting for their catalogue now in OZ , so how come you say that DJ is not using her? More people prefer Miranda than the old Megan!

    Like

  39. @MK

    Um, No.
    Yes, Miranda is doing a shoot for dj’s now but I said they HARDLY use her. She does the bare min. possible and she isn’t even featured on their site. Megan is all over the place. I think last year they even came back and said they got negative market research from cabbage patch so where are you getting that people like her more? That simply isn’t true.
    You still didn’t reply to why she is making so little money with DJ’s compared to both Megan and Jennifer Hawkins?

    VS used her yes, again no one said she didn’t work for them. She still doesn’t get half the gigs or the coverage in their magazines as AL and DK.
    Doutzen is not fat, she just doesn’t look like a 13year old boy with a stick figure.

    So what about any other jobs with Miranda? You didn’t answer the question as to if she was sooo stunning how come she doesn’t have any other jobs but VS Bteam and DJ’s which hardly uses her and pays her very little?

    Like

  40. @MK

    Doutzen is also signed on with L’Oreal and Calvin Klein with contracts and has walked for the biggest designers.

    What has the dingo done expect for VS (bteam) and a department store(cheap pay) to come even close to that league? Nothing.

    Doutzen is also two years younger then she is and way ahead of her.

    Good luck trying to catch up. Ani’t gonna happen.

    Like

  41. @MK

    If you think that Miranda is the best or better than her peers, i’m not going to argue with you cause that is your belief! But to say that Doutzen is a stupid bimbo for the very reason that English is her second language is so absurd.

    You know what, i’ve been following DK’s career since 2007 and i’m a big fan of her! WHY? Because imo, DK is one of the few models out there who is really honest and nice in and out. She’s also one of the testaments in the fashion industry that you can be successful without any hype, fuss, controversies, lies, or famous/rich boyfriend!

    Now, if you want to say that DK is FAT, that’s fine again with me cause for more than two years now, her athletic/curvy body is just the same and she still manages to get BIG/DECENT contracts, ad campaigns, commercial, and hifashion magazine covers and editorials – just this year of 09, DK has 4 consecutive covers of VOGUE(Germany, Latin America, Mexico, Spain) editorials for US VOGUE (April, May, June) and just recently, the US Harpers Bazaar cover.

    Now if you again think that DK is a mediocre model, i’d suggest you look at her profile at models.com and see all her existing contracts and campaigns… not to mention her threads at bellazon and tfs! Start reading it from the beginning to the last page, and i challenge you to come back here again and say DK is fat, ugly, and mediocre!

    If that’s not enough, i will add that DK has a new campaign coming out for Tifanny and co. and a new contract with C&A (you know the brand that also featured Gisele and Alessandra).

    So if you want to insult another model cause you think Miranda is the best or much better, think twice hun!

    Like

  42. Akeelers Spielberg

    MK, I’m glad that you grew a pair and decided to face down the evol h8ters on their own turf. You must be so proud. Now please carry your arse back to Just Jared with the rest of those repugnant assholes and wait for the next Kerrbullshit to continue your bickering. This is not a haven for the intellectually challenged.

    Like

  43. Ki-Ki

    Mk & @Mk 7:22:27:

    Why are arguing with yourself? You’re saying 2 different things under one IP address. Go away, plz.

    Like

  44. pegs223

    This is just way to entertaining!
    Don’t you just love those trackers?
    It’s hysterical who you run across. lol

    Like

  45. jaded4good

    ZOMG, this is amazing! You have your one man (girl?) daily soap right on your blog! That’s what I call enter-phucking-tainment!

    Like

  46. Ki-Ki

    For the record, the “@MK” with the green avatar is a real person. The later “@MK” with the magenta-ish avatar is the phake one.

    Overworked Hobag: A kid who’s been following Doutzen Kroes for two years and impersonating other commenters? :) Methinks its a wind-up.

    Like

  47. Do you idiots want to talk about fashion?
    OK this is not the best I have seen Miranda look I love the shoes and I like all the pieces she is wearing just not together .
    The hair has seen better days too but Miranda is stunning lady and I really loved her at the MET thing and the Gorbachev Foundation Gala last year and her hair is usually beautiful .

    Like

  48. Mystic

    She might as well gone naked to the MET thing as she was already half maked with that dress. Her boob almost fell off her dress at the event last year. So you like slutty outfits?

    Like

  49. Akeelers Spielberg

    Can you expand your vocabulary a bit? The whole “idiot” thing is getting old. Here are some suggestions:

    moron, imbecile, cretin, eri, dingho, Whorelando, nincompoop, ignoramus, etc.

    Like

  50. theoriginal@mk

    Yes, she should have but the nincompoop (thanks Aleekers) thought that she was going to steal the show and get all kinds of attention for it.
    That was yet anther epic fail.

    Like

  51. slapparr

    @MK !

    I’m sure if i wasn’t labouring under quite so much jealousy (Because D list Whorely is so Hawt, particularly with his hat on and one short leg rolled up) i’d be able to idolise Miranda more easily and fully appreciate how stunning she is…..

    Perhaps you can help show me the light?

    Like

  52. slapparr

    You have to bear in mind Wanda her age…. she may be wanting to speed things up a bit – 26 isn’t a great age for a model to become anything…. well apart from retired that is!

    Like

  53. gretta

    I would hate her if she wasn’t so goddamn stupid…on victoria’s secret she was like ”in 10 years from now i really wanna be a mother” what kind of aspirations is that, and a role model to girls

    Like

  54. gretta

    why r u even on here this is for miranda-dingo haters…I don’t care if she’s pretty, she is stupid as hell

    Like

  55. kelly

    omg lol she does look like a cabbage patch kid and im sick of guys going crazy for her her body is horrible! and dont even get me started on her voice …

    Like

  56. kelly

    dude how could you say that? adriana and doutzen are beatiful girls and miranda’s nothing compared to them im surprised shes even a “supermodel” why are you hating on doutzen? your probaby a fatass and mirandas body is freaken disgusting guys dont want girls with bodies like them lol she probably has the same body type as orlando..

    Like

  57. kelly

    i know lol its like i go soo crazy over orlanda bloom .
    ya right! there are wayyyy hotter guys out there that will make you say wowwww

    Like

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